Thursday, October 27, 2005

The OddBall goes to Sesame Street

Do Not Adjust Your Set

For those of you still labouring under the premise that I may still possibly be in my right mind, I offer the following as proof to the contrary. The last couple of days have been spent largely with me catching up on a month’s work of missing shut eye and cleaning up some of the crap that’s accumulated in the OddBall crib. After such labours as the Domestic Goddess, a girl really needs to sit down in front of the telly with a set of sticks and just knit something silly.

Apparently, I went to hell with the joke. I have no idea what this yarn is. I have three balls of it. It’s variegated eyelash something or other. It’s subtle like a brick in the head but it made me smile. I cast it on Tuesday night and knit a ball’s worth. I probably will do extra time in purgatory for not quitting while I was ahead but I figured I need another unfinished project about as much as I need a punch in the mouth and I persevered beyond all dictates of common sense or even good taste.

Last night, I finished the knitting and was holding it up at arm’s length, admiring it in the fullness of its garishness when the OddBall IT and Technical Support Division wandered by.

“That is the ugliest scarf I’ve ever seen in my life.” Nothing quite as heart-warming as fashion commentary from a man who still finds dressing himself a major life challenge.

I stood back and admired it again, under the greenish glare of the fluorescent lights in the kitchen. “You know, I happen to think it looks exactly like Big Bird with a dose of the chicken pox.”

Over the top and then some

So there you have it folks, the OddBall interpretation of the bird flu. And I ask, what’s a potential global pandemic without a few dangly bits? Exactly. So I spent the rest of the evening, plunked in front of the television, watching Dalziel and Pascoe on BBC Canada and beading the damn thing, like I was somehow in my right mind. Nothing like counting a zillion itty bitty seed beads while indulging in a little murder, psychopathic savagery and of course, suicide, to take the edge off the evening.

I rest content knowing that somewhere, some 10 year old is going to love it and think it’s the most beautiful thing going. My inside source in that demographic thinks it’s gorgeous.
Today, I’m going to see if I can’t redeem myself for having inflected this upon the unwitting world. Talk to you’se all laters; thanks for reading.


At 10:08 AM, October 27, 2005, Anonymous the hubby said...

Excuse me I do know how to dress myself. Just because it is always dark colors. If I want color I will put ketchup on my fries.

At 7:49 AM, October 29, 2005, Blogger Diana said...

Now that I have read your post and viewed your latest handknit scarf, I'm removing my unglasses!

I hope your enjoying the time off work. I have a 3 day weekend, which just isn't long enough.

At 8:59 AM, October 29, 2005, Blogger Kate, the Odd Ball Knitter said...

All it really needs is a dimmer switch!

At 9:53 AM, October 30, 2005, Blogger Diana said...

You are too funny!

At 6:31 PM, October 30, 2005, Blogger Liz said...

OMG I am so sorry that I have been out of the loop. Kate honey, there is definately a twelve step program for that yarn.although in the can't lose the kidin a crowd category it is a definate winner. I am with the IT department on this one. Hell he was right about my battleship Lavender experience. That was a definate 911 call!!!!
Lovin the black scarf. See you at Lunch tomorrow. It will be disgustingly healthy but yummy.


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