Saturday, December 24, 2005

Merry Christmas ...

Merry Odd Ball Christmas...

‘Twas the night before Christmas,
And what was a-happenin’?
The OddBall was knitting,
Instead of a-napping.

Actually, for a change, this is not the case. The last two days have been most disconcerting because I’ve been done and ready to roll. No chucking things at my head because the only reason I’m ahead of the game is I’m working this Christmas and what wasn’t done by the 22nd wouldn’t be done.

Lots didn’t get done. Which is fine because I think people won’t remember what I didn’t do but are likely to remember if I completely blow a gasket and strangle some unsuspecting person with my headset. Self-induced stress is not a viable homicide defence in most jurisdictions.
Not that I’m normally in such a gruesome mood for the holidays -- it just the TV is all sweetness and light these days and I’m sorely short of my daily diet of mayhem and murder.

Oh, and for the general amusement of all…I spent the past month knitting like a woman possessed. I made 3 hats and assorted scarves for co-workers. The plan was to post the accomplishments to the ‘Blog when I finally unchained myself from the knitting machine. Alas, the night of the 22nd came and went and in my frenzy to get the damn things wrapped to take to work for 0700h on the 23rd, I completely forgot to photograph them. I'll try to sneak in some 'found in the wild" shots if I locate them again, now that they've grown up and moved on .

Yeah, typical. It’s not the I lose my mind over the holidays -- this is pretty much a 365 day a year performance. In any event, co-workers liked my presents. I got some cool things back in return.

I’ll get back to the ‘Blogging after Christmas. I’m off to Halifax (weather permitting) to visit my sister and her pig. NO, that is not disparaging remarks about my really sweet brother-in-law or any of my three totally great nephews. Wait until the next blog -- I’ll send pictures. I’m knitting the pig a coat. Seriously. Ask Liz.

All right now, time to go make stuffing for that bird. What the hell was I thinking? I lost my mind in the grocery store and bought -- get this -- a 9.83 kg -- that’s 21 lbs for turkey -- for 3 people’s Christmas dinner. Am I mad? Don’t answer that!

Talk at you’se all laters; thanks for reading.

And everyone, have a Merry, and possibly even a tasteful, Christmas holiday. For those of you who don’t celebrate, have a good week in spite of it all. Would you care for a turkey sandwich anyway??

PS: Like the art behind the tree? Silas Robinson -- remember the name. He's a lad who's going places.

Monday, December 12, 2005

And the lucky winner is...

Some lucky Oddball Friend, Family member or maybe even someone I actually like and respect is going to get this for Christmas.

Back off, it's the Temari Ball on the left. The incredibly cute kid is just a rental. No expenses spared on modelling fees for this, not us.

More on Temari balls later when I finish staring at it and determine exactly how out of your mind you'd have to be to do this. The artist, by the way, is the blonde chick's now crosseyed Momma, aka Jackie. That there Temari ball has been blogged twice now, which is pretty much the Marysville equivalent of being picked up the Museum of Civilization.

For the record, all of you who were wondering about our road trip to Briggs & Little, it still stands. It was a sucessful SEX kinda moment. The only one we were missing was Diana.

I'm currently chained to the knitting machine, when I'm not dabbling in the dye pot, so it's back to the salt mines for me. Yes, Diana, I got the tag and I'll post it as soon as I actually lay hands on my knitting bag. Talk at you'se all laters; thanks for reading.

The rewards of home felting

Riches beyond compare

Oh, I’m just so very excited. I can hardly contain myself. I went downstairs the other day and you’ll never guess what I found -- I think that the OddBall IT Help Desk and Technical Support Division bought me a set of home felting machines for Christmas. They’re not so big as you might expect but look very solid in their white enamel jackets. The one on the left you can put dirty clothes in and some soap and half an hour later, the clothes are all wet but much cleaner than before. It also has a ‘hot water’ button (what will these engineers think of next), which activates the ‘felting function’.

I tried it out the other day because I just couldn’t contain myself. I used several pairs of jeans to help balance the load. According to the directions on the lid of the left hand one, load balancing is very important to the felting function. I put in the keruffle scarf and voila, I now have a shorter but much feltier kerfuffle scarf.

And…ohhhhhhhh and this is the bestest part….the machine gives money back. Look what I found in the bottom of it when I took the jeans and everything out -- $12. I’m sure this machine will pay for itself in short order at this rate.

Today, it’s Briggs & Little run for Jackie, Liz and this here OddBall. Yeah, I actually do NEED more yarn. Honest, it’s not some scam I’m pulling on the OddBall IT Help Desk and Technical Support Division, in spite of his misgivings on the matter.

I’d tell more but…okay, the hard part about having a knitting blog where you’re supposed to blog about knitting, is that

a) you have to have knitting in order to blog or
b) you have to be able to blog about what you’re knitting.

I’ve had a few occasions over the past nine months where I had nothing knit to blog about. This time, it’s worse yet again. I’m stuck in the hideous situation of Door # 2. I have a zillion things knit, part knit and in desperate need of being finished knitting around or about the 25th of this here month. The bad part is that many of the persons for whom this knitting is destined read this blog so if I talk about it here, they know what they get for Christmas which totally kills the whole point of having it wrapped up in pretty paper in the first place. You all following this? Of course you are -- I have the smartest readers ever.

And no, dammit, I have no intentions of finishing that sweater, so just enough with the pouting.

In any event, the adventure continues. I’ll talk at you’se all laters; thanks for reading.

Sunday, December 04, 2005

The ker-ruffle continues...

Help, my mother's an OddBall.

It’s hard to hold your head up in public when your mother is a certified Weirdo. Get used to it, kid…I haven’t hit menopause yet. There’s plenty more wacky where that came from. I've still got a full complement of estrogen -- wait until that stuff starts running low.

On the knitting front, one would think that 4,738 rows of knitting would suffice for a scarf. WRONG. It was about half enough for a scarf. I suspect the writers and editorial staff at KnitWords have their head firmly up their keister. In the instructions for this Rufflemania Scarf (page 10), they give the pre felting dimension of this scarf at 7 x 78”. After felting, it’s supposed to come in at 5 x 72”. We’ll see when I haul mine out of the washing machine, but I’m willing to bet that I’m going to see a whole lot more shrinkage in the felting process than 8%. In any event, the 4738 rows of short row ruffle was NOT enough. I ended up knitting another zillion miles of it.

I also figured out (I think) a better way of putting this thing together. I had most of a ball of wool left so I did up my way and put it into felt with the other one.

Of course, given my track record with the felting, I suspect I just wasted a week’s worth of time and 400 grams of otherwise innocent wool. We’ll see. We’re officially in spin mode now.

Enough with the commentary from the cheap seats! And that includes you, Liz.

Talk at you’se laters; thanks for reading.